What is your opinion?
Masterfully Macabre
"From the opening to the final twist this story held me captured. Written in such a way that I could feel Sanderson's mounting anxiety and growing confusion. The pacing is taut and nicely builds a sense of isolation and foreboding and the dialogue crisp and tight with just enough foreshadowing to give the reader a clue as to what might be coming without giving away the ending, which was delivered with a grace that shows the author's mastery of the short story format and, if you haven't yet read "Happy Nights Inn" I have to ask, what are your waiting for? But let me be the first to warn you, you won't have a restful night at this particular inn."
Splendid work!
"OOOO! I would literally die if I was in Bill's situation. I am exceedingly impressed by your prolific writing skills and the eerie ambiance you create in such a short space of time, along with the pandemonium of confusion he awakens to! Wow, I didn't feel like I was reading at all! I could vividly envision the scene, the protagonists actions, I felt as if I was watching a film!"
Terrifying!
"I'm so impressed with anyone who can write horror honestly! It's tricky and you definitely have to have the right skill set for it! This was an entertaining and horrifying read. It had a nice mystery and I loved the suspense with it!"
Lots of potential
"I really like where this story could go, lots of room for something really big and feels very open to a interesting world/ adventure. Personally I felt like it needed to slow down as the use of the very short sentences felt too punchy and I got the sense that at the beginning the writing was designed to invoke the sense of panic but it didn't completely work for me... Slowing it down and building up to more of a panic could bring the reader with you as there feels like there is not time to take it in and to get familiar with the character and his surroundings. Some of the above could be taken into the other chapters as it feels very quick and almost loses its intended edge or suspense/ excited because things happen to quickly in terms of the writing. I hope this helps and makes some sense, I am new to this!!"
Loved it!
"I loved this. It was my first read on this app, and the first book that I could actually sit through without getting bored. It kept me interested and a little on edge, wondering what was going to happen next. Can’t wait for more from the author. "
A rather interesting story
"Actually a really good story with a brilliant plot.. The turned phrases are witty and make one think. “ cleaning their bloody messes” for instance Liked the style of writing and the ending did not disappoint. "
A Cool Idea
"The start of the story seems to have a very confused perspective that’s a little hard to follow. First, it sounds like actions in a script, then internal monologue, and then 1st person. This could be made a lot clearer with formatting. Use italics for internal thoughts, maybe bold italics for the scene-setting part? The grammar mistakes are mostly small ones ("it's" instead of "its" and such). There’s also a lot of fragmented sentences in the beginning. They can work in your favor for pacing, but there’s just too many here. It makes everything feel very… stiff. The quality of the writing REALLY picks up at, “The white light”. I like that he takes a pocket knife and then feels like he’s being stabbed by the air. I find it weird he doesn’t initially know who he is or what he looks like, but he does know that he’s “not the type to hitchhike”. You should probably find an alternate word for “desk” or just avoid saying it 4 times in the course of 7 sentences. The main character seems to have no reaction to the old man telling him the other people tend to leave bloody messes. You need to cut down on your use of "um".... by a lot. The imagery of the room is really well done. Then I didn't have notes after that because I was trapped in the story. It had a really strong ending and was really well done. But if this wasn't for a review, I probably would have stopped reading much earlier on, which is sad because the ending made it all worth it. I'd work on your openings and starting off with more energy or something to hook in the reader."
