Chapter 1. *surprised pikachu face*
Hello ! kitty here. You may call me aurthor-chan if you like . here saying I am NOT a arsonist, criminal . Or been physically abused . story is a not vent vent kinda . may
Be slow to update it depends.
Warning . abuse/deppression/self harm/minor curseing / LGBTQ+ / homophobic elements/ suicidal or harmful thoughts
Enjoy reading😗✌
Donnies pov
4:00 pm
I am laying in my 'bed' that is just old sheets in a pool of my own blood. I want to get out of this hell hole . I mean this is normal for me but you can still dream about living a
Perfect life. Right? Ugh I need to my chores. But my stomach , back and , legs are still burning from the particularly
brutal beating from mother last night . I still havent moved and inch!
I mean I am only sixteen I mean who would expect me to deal with. SHUT UP! I need to do this or I'll get a worse beating than last night. You aren't even a normal human being. Your part of the 60% of fucking
freaks who can do weird shit! You should be able to handle some beatings and chores along with mean words. Other people have it worse ! But I can't ! I just cant!
Need to get up. Need to get up. Need to get up .Need to get up . NEED TO GET UP! I need to get my lazy ass up and do shit ! Mother is home in SIX HOURS, though she may take a extra hour or two due to her going out and
drinking and going bars ,and I have yet to take out the trash , do homework , fix the tub thats been broken for two days , pump up mother's second car's tire, clean up her room from last night when she brought a stranger over , clean myself up , laundry, clean up my room ,make dinner for mother . and if this isnt done to absoulute perfection I will get a beating . and I gotta take care of my little secret dog that I have. His name is Erin ! He has been with me from even before dad ... Died. He's the only one who has ever cared for me! Mother thinks all animals are a nuisance
But Erin such a sweet little puppy ! He has helped me through so many bad times
Well I got started on doing those things . I got done with most of the chores . but I'm not quite finished . mother should be home by now ? Well I guess I should make use of this . I mean if mother isnt here and i havent completely finished the chores and i just lie a bit.... Is that TECHNIIIIIICALLY wrongg . I mean I finished the choresss heh heh .
¤¬¤¬¤two hours later¤¬¤¬¤
Okaaaay . where is mother? I mean I dont want to see her ,if anuthing I want to see her burn like the stuffies she burned I just want to run away from her and hide in a corner for the rest of my life and maybe find someone who cares about me to cuddle me to make up for my touch deprivation ;u; * i think thats the word*well I mean i still do habe to take the cloths out of the washerrrrr but we dont talk about that heh*insert that one hand thing*. But I mean she could have gone and
Stayed with one of her mean ass shat boyfriends . I guess I'll wait
*btw author loves to break 4th walllll*
¤¬¤¬¤5 seconds later¤¬¤¬¤
I'm boreeeeeeed ! I went to my mother's bedroom to go on her computer . I mean if I'm caught doing this I'll be dead five days ago . but that IF I'm caught . Morals of life , anything is free if you run fast enough . and , if they didnt see it it never happened. whenever I go on my mothers computer . I never go on and watch happy things. I mean I kinda want to . but I need to be caught up on things . I go to online school now because I almost was day at with scars. Not just from mother. So she made me go to online school . I have been going online since I was 8. I used to have friends . I only miss one of them. His name is Wyatt . he is only two weeks oer but some people are idiots and consider us a month apart . like hello i was born last week of November and Wyatt was born first week in December. Two damn weeks.
After I was done watching the news I am always confused . Why did they arrest the guy who killed the robber who shot his daughter . I mean we are all glad the daughter made it . but the dad just had his daughter shot by this big buff guy trying to rob the house . he just happened to have a
Pocket knife . who wouldnt stab the guy 500 fucking times until the authorities dragged him away. It was self defence .
Anyways I should take a bath it's been a full three days with no bath and my hair is getting greasy .
I slowly walk out of the room , trying to avoid further injury. Everything felt like it was on fire! I was tearing by the time I reached the stairs . it hurt so damn bad I
couldn't care less that the washer was most likey ready to be emptied.
Oh great.... I have to get upstairs .i start walking up thinking about everything. fuck my life I just want to colapse right here. Why do I even bother trying! I don't contribute in anyway possible. I'm not even worth feeding a full meal on a day to day basis. I only get a quarter of a meal every three days. In which there has to be a Reason for that
Right? RIGHT!? I can't just be punished for somethong I didn't do RIGHT ! IM FUCKING RIGHT , RIGHT!?! Oh I'm already at the door to the bathroom!
Well that wasn't hard ! Yeah Maybe I can do this! But my injuries tell me otherwise heh. I take a step forward and open the doo . ooO that hurt my arm . i take off My clothes and I realize just how many cuts ,excludeing the s-self inflicted ones , bruises ,scabs,and it was obvious I had some broken bones and ribs. at least four ribs broken ribs and two broken bones .
I look into the mirror and I see this ugly
motherfucker pale like a vampire pointy ass weird pointy elf ears and blue hair . Oh wait , heh that's me . I am kind of weird question mark? I mean it's obvious I am just fucked . mentally physically financially ect. But I actually don't even try . I do the bare minimum but then feel bad I didn't go above and beyond even though I was already required to go through the limits or else. I want to be a hero but yet at the same time I realize they are all just doing it for fame money or sex- ah shit i said it . DASGOOSTANG!!! I cant honestly imagine doing ... That... Without knowing them the least . we're all going to hell , GOOD LUCK. People also be justifying heros who do the unconsentual ... Thingy thing...
Crazy what you can get away with when your a hero because your "noble" and saved thousands of life's and THAAAAT justifys you...?I mean I even take pleasure in the pain I give to myself ,that bad as it is , but I cant stand the pain anyone else gives ! If someone just casually cut my leg l would scream out in pain if it werent mother . because mother makes me stay quite because if i dont the neighbors will be alerted . but almost everyday I cut my legs and it makes me feel better . Well either way I'm most likey crazyyyy . I admit it ! What does everyone mean this would be normal for anyone going through this? I am a freak with no purposes!I don't deserve anything but pain and misery! Why wont a single damned soul understand ? Why cant anyone think about what I actually am instead of straight up lying to everyone at the least similar to me like " oh honey its okay fuck those haters you beutiful you matter it's fine you'll be fine it'll only take." Five hunderd fucking years
Why did this happen to me
Why. Am I like this
Why. Do i do this dumb bull shit
Why. Would anyone care for me
Why do i not understand myself
Why. Dont I understand people
Why. Am I a loser
Why. Do I even fucking try
Why. Don't I do anything productive
Why! Do i only do what told
Why! Do I get disiplined like this
Why! do the people I meet online claim I have trauma
Why!just why the fricking hell do I exist
Why!
Why !
Why!
Ŵhŷ!
I always question why I'm like this why I'm like this. Why dont I have a purpose I always wonder. I mean do I only serve the purpose as mothers maid. Oh wait I'm already in the shower dripping scorching water. Heh it's
o-okay. Feeling the burning grounds me
¤¬¤¬¤ a hour later ¤¬¤¬¤
I was out of the bath , the dinner was getting cold but its okay because I can reheat it
But mother should be here by now. I hear
loud knock . I guess that's mother.
okay it's been five minutes why isn't she coming in its weird she usually comes emedietly comes in and yells at me to tell her if I did my chores " Ey its very chilly in Minnesota ,even in the early fall aren't you going to answer ." I heard a man say
Who the fuck is that
I s-should a-answer him r-ight . oh god. GOD IM - IM AT THE DOOR . shitttttttt ! I slowly open the door trying to focus on the pain this time actually because if I dont I will most likey try and run . well maybe I should run . what if hes this big scary man trying rob mother. Or what if hes here to kill me! WHAT IF MOM HIRED HIM AS A HITMAN TO TRY AND KILL ME!!! The guy opened the foor as I was apparently to slow. I was going to fast !!! As you can tell I'm paranoid
" hello young man!do you happen to be donnie Hart? " the man dressed in a scruffy worn out police officer uniform greeted with a big smile on his face . ugh I hate cops ! " u-uh I uh yes s-sir?" I stutter out finally. If you haven't noticed, i have a stuttering problem !
" well Donnie . I'm sorry to say but your
step-mom has been arrested and given a two year sentace for drunk driving and causing a four way accident . leading five deaths" the cop said .what the fuck. STEP-mother. Either way I was jumping for joy ! But I of course can't show that. Im very at acting . i muster up some pent up tears . which mind you I am good at doing
" wha-What ar-re Y-your-you ta-ta-talking
a-about" I stuttered while emmiting fakeness .holding my chest, in a tiny bit of my stuttering and obviously nobody would cry Right? Or they would at least keep it to his or her self. I mean I am barely shedding three tears . But am I overdoing this? I mean only few people can see through my act . that is mother, Wyatt , And Papa . and oh shit he's dead so only like two people along with maybe few professional actors could see through me. So I probaly look like a crybaby. Oh wait . Heh I am a damn fucking hell bound gay little crybaby. Everyone hates me including my classmates. I bet the kids at whatever orphanage will hate me more and beat me more and just it will all be terrible
" oh shit! Its okay kid! Um . so do want me to come inside and I'll explain it better" the guy said . I nodded my head . i need some damn details.
To be ✨c o n t i n u e d ✨
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