01 Mistake
The last step off the bus wobbled under my foot. Sure I had to hold onto the street lamp to get my balance but I felt better blaming the polished silver scrap of public transportation for my unsteady dismount. The crisp night air helped clear my head along with the bright white lights. I was disappointed Curtis didn’t come, he always brought the best stuff, but Berry made it. That human light pole reminded me how much fun it used to be to discard logic and throw myself entirely into a party.
Though, he also reminded me I needed to make it home before Carol and Jeff tonight. Earning him the title of “My Cute Conscience” which may be a downer but his smile always makes up for it.
A high ping vibrated in my ears so faint I shook my head hoping to release it. The shaking tipped me off my center and again I stumbled into the next city issued light pole. Patting the cold metal in appreciation I failed to notice the pinging hadn’t ceased and instead it steadily intensified. Changing from a high ring into a steady serenade of up and down tones. It took a few chorus’ until they became a mutated melody as they echoed off the walls of each house.
Now with pulsing temples, I followed the strategically placed pools of light down the street. It wasn’t until I was yards from my destination, that I finally connected the annoying musical instruments, with the fire brigade and medical unit, both of which were parked in Carol’s front yard …
which is my front yard …
where I’m supposed to be.
Blood rushed to my impaired brain. The flashing lights gave crisp outlines to the vehicles and surrounding houses. The sound of siren’s ballooned as if pulled down a distant shaft and that’s when my legs stopped moving.
There I stood, locked in place watching the red and white lights flash, brilliantly contrasting against the night sky. That mailbox … yes, that’s my mailbox. 892EG9 … yes, that’s my house address tagged on the side. And those are the pale gray steps I was planning on taking to the front door … The red front door. It sat open. My red front door was my open.
Why was my door opened?
The scene swayed, back and forth as if the entire planet was balancing on a pin. A woman came running. Her face was coated in water, and more fell from her brown eyes. It’s Carol, my brain said. It spoke to me as if I were a child, Carol is your foster mother. She takes care of you. Why is Carol crying?
The woman wrapped her slender arms tightly around my shoulders. She sobbed into my hair and said my name triggering all sound around me to return.
The sirens came crashing back as if barreling down a tin shaft. Whispering neighbors pounded in my eardrums, like the base through an amplifier speaker.
“Lianne you’re okay. Are you okay?” Carol’s voice was horse and scratchy, but the relief couldn’t be ignored as she looked me over.
“What’s going on?” Though I didn’t feel my mouth open, I recognized my voice.
“Where have you been?” Carol asked, her cold palms pressed against my heated cheeks.
My eyes returned to the front door where three men emerged. The blue stretcher at their fingertips glided down the uneven surface toward the Medical Unit. Strapped securely on top I made out his little unmoving body, the bandage on his head soaked red with blood.
My chest tightened, as the contents of my stomach bubbled up into my throat. I swallowed hard to hold them there when Jeff appeared. His large hands gripped his wife’s shoulders as he attempted to get her attention. “Honey, you need to ride with Cory.” Carol’s eyes held mine. Jeff pried her fingers from my arms before leading her forward, “Liana and I will follow in the car. She will be right behind you.”
Like a bad Comm connection, pixeled lines burst across my vision. The doors swung closed on the Emergency unit. Carol was gone. Jeff stood beside me. Shoulder to shoulder.
’Ask him what happened.’ My brain ordered, ‘What happened? What happened?’ Instead of words my hands flew to cover my mouth. My rapid pulse pumped alcohol saturated blood into my brain and the swaying intensified all the sick in my stomach began moving upward again. I managed to hold it at bay until I felt Jeff’s shadow shift toward me.
He knew. It was my fault and he knew. Thats why he stood silent, still, like a statue. Neither one of us moving, until the lights and sirens were far in the distance.
The connection in my brain shorted again forcing everything to go black. When it cleared I was being buckled into the passenger seat before Jeff brought the family vehicle to life. It took several minutes before the silence in the cab started screaming at me. It begged me to make some sense of what was going on. Carol was crying. The little boy, Cory - blood ... I should be speaking. I should be crying but the one that broke the silence was Jeff.
“I know you won’t remember what I say right now.” He spoke in a very controlled voice, careful to not be too loud. “And I will repeat it when you’re sober. Thank you, for coming home.” His voice cracked, and the glass dam behind my eyes shattered.
Tears washed down my cheeks in countless numbers. My mixed emotions made it impossible know if their driving force was guilt, sorrow, happiness, or fear. I buried my face into my knees I sobbed until the stress of my body became too much. My mind shut completely down and it all went black.
CONTINUE ...