Luca

You know how at one point you find yourself looking back on all the choices you’ve made in life? All the mistakes, all the right decisions and all the wrong ones - and you start to consider where your life would have been if you’d just made one different choice, one less mistake.

Well, Luca Falcone was the biggest mistake of my life and yet - at the time - he was the best decision I’d ever made.

Maybe that isn’t saying much, considering I was only nineteen when I met him. Young, naive, and hopeful in the way teenage girls so often are before they realize the harsh realities of the world.

The first time we met I took one look at him and knew he was trouble of the worst kind. Everything about him - even back then - radiated danger, but that didn’t negate the fact he was the sexiest man I had ever seen, and he had this charm about him that was impossible to deny no matter how hard I tried to.

In the beginning, I tried to ignore him, and my attraction to him, and failed miserably. Instead, I ended up falling for his relentless pursuits. He put in the work, made it his personal mission to draw me into his snare.

Seeing as I was young, naive and hopeful, I was flattered and eventually succumbed to his charms. For me it was a whirlwind romance that lasted almost two years before the inevitable happened and he broke my heart into a million tiny pieces, dashing my hopes of the beautiful future I had dreamt of.

It took six years before I opened myself up to the possibility of a relationship again, of finding love with someone else. That’s how bad Luca hurt me.

And of course, it was just my luck that when I’d finally met a nice man who was willing to take things in my pace, someone I could see myself being with, that the one and only ghost of my relationship past walked back into my life.

“Ana”

My mind snapped back to the present and I looked across the table at Matt. He was an attractive man with kind blue eyes, dark blonde hair that was a smidge too long and messy in a cute way, and he was built like a linebacker.

His kind eyes looked worried as he watched me and I cleared my voice and shifted uncomfortably in my chair as I attempted not to let my eyes slide to the front of the restaurant, where only minutes ago I’d watched Luca walk in.

“I’m sorry, did you say something? It’s been a long day,” I fibbed, even though it wasn’t a complete lie, it just wasn’t why I was distracted.

Matt smiled and reached across the table to grab one of my hands, giving it a light squeeze when he did.

“Nothing important. You should have told me you were tired, we could have rescheduled.” I gave him a halfhearted smile back and shook my head.

“No, I want to be here. I’ve been looking forward to this all week.”

And I had.

We’d been seeing each other for six months and Matt thought it deserved celebrating. With his busy workschedule and my busy workschedule we’d hardly seen each other at all over the last month, and I’d gotten used to having him around and spending time with him. It wasn’t a lie to say I missed him when we went days without talking to each other, but that was just it, with Luca we’d never gone a day without talking even if we didn’t see each other and I had missed him all the time.

God, what was going on with me?

Matt was possibly the best man and boyfriend anyone could ask for, someone any woman would be lucky to have and there I was, comparing him to my ex who broke my heart forever ago.

“Good,” Matt murmured, still smiling that soft beautiful smile, and I decided to put all thoughts of Luca where they belonged - in the past - and enjoy a beautiful night and romantic date with my boyfriend of six months who was the greatest, nicest man on the planet.

“Have you ever been here before?” I asked in order to change the subject and Matt let my hand go as he leaned back in his chair and picked up his wineglass.

“No, but a colleague of mine recommended it to me, said it serves the best italian food in the city.”

“I don’t know about that,” I contradicted.

It was a matter of pride. My dad owned the best Italian restaurant in the city, something I’d often bragged to Matt about, which was probably why he grinned and winked at me before taking a drink of his wine.

“I figured you’d say that, though you still haven’t given me any proof to the contrary.” Oh boy, now we were moving into dangerous territory.

In the six months we’d been together, three of which we were only dating before we became “official” as my best friend Letty called it, I hadn’t introduced Matt to my family.

It wasn’t that I didn’t want to, it was just... I wasn’t quite ready. My family knew I was seeing someone, I talked about him often and my mom had been nagging me to bring him to Sunday dinner for almost as long as we’d been together, but for some reason I was just... hesitant.

This too I blamed Luca for.

When we were together we eventually reached the point where he met my family, and to say my dad was not his biggest fan would be an understatement. This likely had to do with the fact everyone in our community knew who Luca was, who he worked for and who he’d eventually be, and my father was not particularly thrilled to have me involved in any of that.

It had been difficult for me, knowing that the man I loved so much it scared me, didn’t get along with my family, but I’d been able to make it work because of that love and because they both loved me. They were never friendly, but they kept things civil on the rare occasion they were forced to interact.

My parents hadn’t met Matt, but I knew they would love him because there was no other way to put it - Matt was exactly the kind of man any parent would be proud to have as a potential son-in-law.

“Well,” I said, and made another decision that may or may not be another mistake, “I guess I’ll have to rectify that. My mother is making her homemade lasagna for Sunday dinner, my dad serves it at the restaurant. Consider yourself invited.”

Matt laughed and leaned slightly over the table, his eyes twinkling with humor as he said, “I’ll be there.”

I grinned and grabbed my own wineglass, taking a healthy sip before I put it back on the table and did my best to ignore the turbulent emotions coursing through my system.

It was part excitement, part uncertainty and not a little dose of panic, but I decided to focus on the excited part and deal with the rest later.

The next hour went by quickly as our food arrived at the table. We ate, finished a bottle of wine and started on a second as we ordered dessert. During all of this we talked and laughed and it was just so easy and relaxing that I forgot about Luca completely.

This, I would learn, was a mistake.

I was laughing at a story Matt was telling when a shadow fell on the table and I tipped my head back to look at the intruder, expecting it to be our waiter with the check that Matt had ordered a few minutes earlier.

My laughter instantly stopped as my eyes locked with Luca’s.

“Ana,” he murmured and I swallowed as my eyes quickly moved to Matt who was studying Luca with a considering expression that didn’t bode well for my peace of mind.

I had to clear my voice as I moved my eyes back and folded my hands in my lap.

“Luca,” I greeted curtly.

God, what was he doing there? And why was he talking to me?

“It’s been a long time.”

“Mhm.” I agreed, keeping it short, not wanting to engage in whatever it was he wanted from me.

It was at this moment Matt cleared his voice and Luca’s head turned his way, making mine do the same, and I tensed as Matt rose from his seat and extended his hand towards the man who I’d once convinced myself was the love of my life.

Luca’s face revealed absolutely nothing as he accepted Matt’s outstretched hand and I found myself holding my breath as they shook.

“I’m Matt Hartigan, Ana’s boyfriend.”

“Luca Falcone, I’m an old - ” Luca’s eyes came to me for a second before they moved back to Matt and he said, “friend of Ana’s.”

In that moment I wanted to hide under the table. No joke, if it wasn’t prime dinner time in New York City, I would have physically slid down my chair and curled up under the table. Seeing as that wasn’t an option, I gave Matt a tight smile as his eyes met mine, a silent question looking back at me, and I gave a subtle shake of my head to indicate I’d explain later, something I was not sure I would do.

“Nice to meet you,” Matt muttered as their hands released and Luca’s eyes once more moved my way, and they stayed locked on me when he spoke next, although his words were not aimed at me.

“Do you mind if I borrow Ana for a minute, I need to discuss a personal matter with her. It’s urgent.”

If I thought I was tense before, Luca’s words and the look he was giving me would prove me wrong as I felt every inch of my body turn to concrete.

“No problem,” Matt murmured and my eyes shot to him to see he was now studying me in that same considering way he’d been studying Luca earlier, “I need to take care of the check anyway. I’ll grab your coat on the way out honey, meet you outside in five minutes?”

As if moving on autopilot, my head moved up and down in a nod, when it should have been moving rapidly side to side in a big firm NO!

I did not want him to leave me alone with Luca, but I couldn’t exactly say that without telling him why and that was not a conversation I wanted to have in front of a packed restaurant, and definitely not in front of Luca who would no doubt get a kick out of hearing how badly he’d messed me up.

That panic I’d been feeling earlier rose to epic proportions as Matt gave me a reassuring smile, tipped up his chin at Luca and moved away from the table.

Next thing I knew, Luca had his hand curved around my elbow and was guiding me up and out of my chair.

I would never admit it out loud, but in that moment I was happy he was holding me because I was pretty sure my shaky legs would have given way and sent me tumbling to the floor if he wasn’t.

Still holding onto me, he started guiding me away from the table and towards the back of the restaurant towards the private dining rooms reserved for bigger parties.

With every step I took, my heart pumped harder inside my chest as my mind scrambled to figure out what on earth he’d want to talk to me about.

I hadn’t seen or heard from the man in almost six years, it didn’t make sense. I was still attempting to come up with a plausible reason when he led me into one of the private dining rooms, closed the door behind us and only then did his hand let my arm go.

I instinctively took three steps away to put some distance between us and drew in a deep calming breath, all the while I never took my eyes off him.

Luca Falcone was a predator, turning your back on him or lowering your guard down for even a second was equal to baring your neck to a hungry wolf, and I knew better than exposing myself to an attack.

Remembering all the pain and heartbreak he put me through, I wrapped those feelings around me like a shield and braced for impact. If anyone could get through the armor it was Luca, with the exception of one very significant aspect...

I was no longer that nineteen year old girl with stars in her eyes and dreams of happily ever after. She was long gone, and I knew better than to let Luca affect me that way again.

“So,” I demanded, not giving a shit that I sounded just as angry as I was feeling, “what’s this urgent private matter you broke up my date to talk to me about?”

To be honest, I wasn’t sure I wanted to know. Nothing Luca could have to say was anything I wanted to hear, but whatever. There we were and I was going to hear it no matter what, so it was better to just get it over with and get back to Matt as soon as possible.

“You look good, bella."

“Don’t,” I said quietly, hating that even after so many years, his old endearment for me still hit me right in the heart - and not in a good way.

“Just say what you have to say, Luca. Matt is waiting for me and I’d like to get this over with so I can get on with my night.”

His dark midnight-blue eyes were unreadable as he leaned back against the door, one of his hands stuffed in the pocket of his black dresspants, the other he was using to rub his stubbled jaw.

Seeing him like that, I allowed my eyes to roam the length of him and one thing was clear. Like me, the last six years had changed him, I just wished it had been for the worse and not the better.

He was still the most breathtaking man I’d ever seen, and I felt like a bitch for even thinking it, but it was true. His tall lean body had always been unbelievable, packed with lean muscles everywhere, and it was even more so now.

The suit he wore was tailored to perfection, and I didn’t need to have x-ray vision to see he was just as toned now as he’d been back then. He looked like a freaking greek god with his tanned olive skin, those dark chiseled good looks and he still had that same attractive dangerous aura that he’d always had. Except now it was darker, more powerful and he carried himself like he knew it too.

“Well,” I prompted when he continued to stay silent and I was beginning to lose my patience. I’d much rather be outside, saying goodbye to Matt and apologizing for my “old friend” interrupting what had, until that moment, been a beautiful date.

“I need you to give your father a message for me,”

I froze, head to toe, my feet rooted to the ground as I stared at this man who still affected me in ways I didn’t care to admit, and felt the impact of his words.

“What message?” I said so softly I could barely hear my own words, but Luca obviously heard them because he answered and his next words were no less terrifying.

“Tell him he has until the end of next week to pay the debt he owes.”

“What debt?” I whispered, actually feeling the blood drain from my face. Luca wasn’t so willing to answer this question though, he just shook his head and dropped his hand at his jaw to stuff it in his other pocket.

“That’s between me and your father, it’s nothing you need to concern yourself with.”

Obviously, that was an unacceptable answer and I momentarily lost my mind as I broke out of my freeze to plant my hands on my hips, narrow my eyes and lean his way.

“What debt, Luca? You barge into my life after years of nothing, breaking up my date with a guy I really like, drag me into a private room to tell me to give my father a message that he has until the end of next week to pay his debt, and tell me it’s nothing I need to concern myself with? Well, screw that! You’ve already concerned me with it, so tell me what fucking debt my father supposedly owes you!” I hissed, my voice rising on the last words of my semi-explosion.

Luca, on his part, didn’t even show a minute reaction to my increasing agitation. And that was one of the things that used to drive me crazy when we were together, the fact that I was never able to read him. And it drove me no less crazy now.

“Your hair is longer,” was his insane reply and I stared at him, battling against the urge to pick up one of the candleholders from the table behind me and throw it at his head.

“Seriously?!” I hissed, throwing my hands in the air and fisting them in the hair that was indeed longer.

“Yeah,” I agreed, “that kind of thing tends to happen when you haven’t seen someone in six years. They change, hair grows longer, it’s the way of life. Now, answer the damn question.”

Sighing, Luca straightened and pinned me in place with his unreadable gaze.

“A while ago, your father came to me asking for a loan. I agreed, and now it’s time for him to settle his debt.”

Even as he was talking I shook my head. My dad would never do that. Since I was little he’d gone on and on about how much he hated the mob and the way they were corrupting the good people of our community. No way he’d ever go to them for money.

“You’re lying.” I snapped, “My father would never do that.”

Luca shrugged, “I don’t know what to tell you, Ana. Maybe you don’t know your father as well as you think you do. Still, he owes a debt and the time has come to pay up.”

Staring at him, I looked for any signs of deceit, but there was nothing. Dragging my hands down my face I blew out a breath and tried to figure out how to fix the situation.

“How much?” I asked quietly, doing a mental inventory of the funds I had available.

“What?” Luca asked, still studying me in that way that made shivers travel along my spine.

“How much does he owe you?” I demanded.

“Fifty thousand dollars.”

“Oh my god,” I breathed as I stumbled back two steps and came up against a chair, my hand shooting back to clamp around the backrest as I tried to wrap my mind around the insanity of that.

“But that -- that’s impossible.” I kept breathing, “There’s no way he can come up with that kind of money in a week.”

“Your father is a resourceful man, I’m sure he’ll come up with something.”

“I can’t - I don’t - I can’t even wrap my head around that, that’s insanse!” I stammered on a near yell and gripped the chair harder as my legs really threatened to give out. I couldn’t do this, I couldn’t be there with him thinking about the insanity of what he’d just told me and how that might play out for my father.

“I have to go.” I announced abruptly and rushed towards the door, and thankfully Luca did me the courtesy of moving out of my way without me having to ask him to do it, but unfortunately he wasn’t quite finished.

I knew this when his fingers curled around the bare skin of my upper arm right as my fingers curled around the knob and my head jerked to the side and up, and I sucked in a breath as his face was suddenly so close to mine I could feel his breath against my lips.

“You can do better than him, Ana. A guy like that? He’ll never be enough for you.”

Not deeming his words worthy of a reply, I yanked my arm from his grip, tore open the door and rushed through the restaurant straight for the door where Matt was visible on the front walk, waiting for me.

He handed me my coat without a word, hailed a cab and gave me a soft kiss good night before I slipped into the back of the cab and gave the driver my adress.

“We still on for Sunday dinner?” Matt asked softly, standing in the door and I forced a smile and nodded.

“Yeah, I’ll call you with the details. Thank you for tonight, Matt. It was a great date, and I’m really sorry about Luca.” Matt smiled and shook his head.

“Don’t worry about it, honey, and you’re right, it was a great date. I’ll call you tomorrow, yeah?”

“Yeah,” I agreed softly. He leaned in to give me another soft kiss, and it wasn’t until after he’d stepped away, shut the door and the cab pulled into traffic that I allowed myself to think about how very shitty the night had turned.

Making another decision, this one impulsive, I dug my phone out of my pocket, dug up a number I hadn’t used in a while and hit call. Putting the phone to my ear, I looked out the window at a vibrant New York and listened to the beeps on my phone.

“Hello?”

“Lindsey, it’s me. Can we meet?”

I waited as she took a second to answer, then I listened to her answer, and closed my eyes.

“Tonight, yeah. My place in twenty?”

I listened again, took a deep breath, and ended the call with, “Thank you, Linds. See you soon.”