What is your opinion?
A Timeless Tale
"Being young and in love is never easy, but it is especially trying if the object of your heart’s affection is the boy next door that your family has warned you never to go near, much less fall in love with. The Feud is one of those books that can easily appeal to a YA and adult audience, as just about anyone or everyone can relate at some level with the rush of emotions that accompany your first love. The author skillfully blended in elements of Shakespeare’s classic Romeo and Juliet with a modern-day twist between two families (neighbors), the Sharpes and Tetamores, in the small town of Riverton. Andy (Andromeda) Sharpe and her sister Mari (Marigold) are great characters, and I particularly like the fact that Andy’s is a clever take on the whole “star-crossed lovers” angle of Romeo and Juliet (via the celestial theme of her bedroom). Andy is very down to Earth and represents the rational aspect of reality, whereas Mari—affectionately called the Flower Child—very much has her head in the clouds, though her heart is in the right place, except of course, where it concerns her love interest! I would highly recommend this story to anyone who has a love (appreciation) of the classics, as well as anyone who can appreciate a wholesome romance."
The Fued
"I have enjoyed this book so far, and since the first 5 chapters are so intriguing, I will likely read the rest of it when I can. The writing style flows smoothly along with world building and character building as well. I like the echoes of Romeo and Juliet which come through in this novel. The author does a great job with pacing and moving the plot forward. Tension is built along the way through action and dialogue. "
The Feud
"I went through so many emotions while reading this book and I will do it all over again..i loved it all, the characters, the plot, the ups and the downs and most importantly the humanly human part of it..it was real, portraying real human emotions that speak to everyone who feels so to say. I would have loved to know what the fued between the dads was all about really but I guess in the grand scheme of things it really didn't matter. Thank you for such a wonderful read😊"
GEA review!
"I had so much fun reading the opening chapters of this story. I think the strongest component is the dialogue; I genuinely smiled and laughed multiple times throughout the conversations. Andy’s wit and humour were hilarious and it was so enjoyable to read, especially her interactions with Daniel. But I love the relationship she has with her sister too. I like how different they are from one another, but are still able to find common ground, but of course not without their own tiffs as siblings. But overall, Andy feels so real, which made me attach to her immediately. She kind of reminds me of Daria from the tv show of the same name, which I really like. The writing style is wonderful, too. I enjoyed the pace and everything flowed together nicely. I didn’t notice any grammar mistakes as far as I could tell. I can see you’ve put a lot of work into this story and it really shows; this was polished and well put together which allowed me to really immerse myself in Andy’s story. Overall, I’m excited to see what happens next and learn more about this family rivalry! And of course, see what happens next for Andy and the others. Really fantastic job, this was a great read :)"
The feud
"Oh wow what a book. I'm so sad it's over. I just want the story to go on and on. I love how relatable the characters are and how Andy somehow feels like all of us felt at one point in our lives. Love all the attention she gets from Dan. The characters are so well described that you feel like you know them personally. Your writing skills are amazing, and thanks to your very detailed 'author s note' I feel like I learnt so much from you and I can use it to improve my writing for sure. Thank you so much for writing this book over and over until you finally perfected it. Your work is amazing and you are truly inspiring. I too believe that we all have some kind of birth mark like Andy s and the sooner we learn to live with it the better we can live our lives. "
The Feud
"I don’t even know where to start. To be honest, after reading the synopsis, I wasn’t that thrilled to dive into this story because of my personal preferences, but the author hooked me before the first chapter was over. I loved the way the story interweaved the high school drama and Shakespeare’s classical masterpiece. I’m not gonna lie, there were moments when I thought that maybe I didn’t need to know all the details I read and I was starting to be distracted, but the author always pulled me right back into the story with his incredibly distinctive voice and remarks like hating someone with every semipermeable membrane in their being. And the dialogue with a marinade parable? Brilliant."
Feud
"Very enjoyable read. Skilled author with a fantastic writing style. I look forward to reading more of his books. ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️"
The Modern Romeo and Juliet
"Firstly, allow me congratulate you and thank God for giving you the power and the wit to produce such an amazing piece of art. It's art. What I've been reading for the past ten days was definitely art. Excuse my long review, but I tend to be honest and thorough. I honestly don't know where to start. The plot is amazing, creative, and first of it's kind (I've never read something like this before), and the way you dealt with each piece of the story is quite smart and funny. You know when to proceed through your story, when to give the reader a breather, and when to jam it with emotions that the reader feels overwhelmed as much as the character is. Andromeda (I must say you have a knack in choosing names) is a complex character. She struggles with self-loathing and bullying due to the birthmark on her face, and she's satisfied with staying alone in her safe bubble without coming in contact with anyone, yet she's a talented writer, and a loving sister who came up with this idea to finish a life-long feud between her family and that of her sister's boyfriend, and this plan forced her out of her bubble. Nice job making your character uncomfortable with her own skin (it's a figure of speech.) At first, when you showed how lovely Andy's family was and what a cozy atmosphere they make, I thought Andy was a strong female lead and has a good life, but it gradually turned out she was not. And this is good; the reality of her being weak is good; it's good to learn a bit more about the main character through each chapter instead of lumping everything you know about her in one go. This makes the reader eager to continue reading. Although, I'm a bit annoyed with the fact that I'm always not mentally prepared whenever Andy bursts into tears. The girl cries out of the blue and I always don't see it coming. Unlike what you said in your final note about not trusting your characters enough, I felt quite the opposite while reading. It's like you gave the reins to your characters and let them carry on with their emotions and dialogue, although sometimes it got really witty (especially Andy and Dan) that I had to reread it, and other times it got really funny I laughed to my heart content. Speak of the devil, I loved how you introduced Daniel T., and when he turned out to be a nerd I was so happy. It was funny watching Dan and Andy fall into rhythm and outsmart one another. Controlling the pace of the story is a completely different issue. I felt how relaxed you seemed and it was comfortable the way you approached the essence of the plot and the backstory of the family feud. It was all in a slow and understandable and not a dragging manner. Seriously, NOT A DULL MOMENT. The nice thing is that there's a lot happening on Andy's side of the story that I wanted to continue reading from her POV (even if she wasn't the narrator, it was her story) and when reality downed on her and she had to direct the play, and when she first stood up for herself, there was Andromeda Sharpe at the beginning of a transformation process. About Shakespeare and his play, you must love drama so much to be so engrossed in it. I've never thought of reading Shakespeare's plays but I understand the story of Romeo and Juliet. However, when I read it and learned about it from your POV, it amazed me how deep you delved into understanding every aspect of the play and choosing the right characters to play it. That, and the scene with Mrs. L was so creative. Actors and writers as well need to practice brain flexibility. The way you put each of your characters as a character from the play means you've created deviations and experienced different versions of the same characters. It's like creating new characters, and when you poured modern language into it, saying it's genius is understatement. Of all the supporting characters, I loved Andy's Mom and Brian the most. The mother was so understanding, as she always made sure to get the point to her daughters without breaking them. Also, Brian's timing to come and rescue Andy was always the best, although I always wished it'd be Dan. But the story can't proceed without giving the couple a bit of trouble. There were several chapters I've read with a hollow pit in my stomach; I got too attached to Galaxy Girl that I felt every bit of her being throughout the story. How she struggled to make the play as perfect as she can make it, how hard it was to face Daniel with all the misunderstanding rising between them (even though she was dense about the fact that he was jealous) and how hard it was after her face-off with Sharon. Which brings me to this; I feel that Sharon's backstory was quite abrupt. I understand that you had to patch things up between her and Andy, but when Andy apologized for slapping Sharon and the latter gave a satisfactory smile, I was ocked to find her crying and apologizing to Andy later. It would've been more realistic if Sharon was in almost-imperceptible shock instead of being satisfied with Andy's apology. Sharon was also living in a state of hatred that she had to blame someone for the things that happened to her. But I like how things turned out at last; how Andy was finally able to forgive her rival, direct a genius version of Romeo and Juliet, and live the horrors of almost living such a tragedy due to her dad and Daniel's. Can I be proud of someone else's character? Because I'm proud of Andy. About Mason Jar and Sweet Tea, I believe it's a nice add to the story, a sweet and smart short story, and another evidence that you're so good at juggling more than twenty characters in the same stage. The fact that some are based on real-life people is intriguing, this shows how much a writer can use from life instead of watching it move on through their window. Technically, since I'm known for being a grammar police, there're few grammatic mistakes and punctuation mistakes. I've never read a novel (outside this platform) where exclamation points and question marks are used more than once or used together, although it's a pass in the case of Daniel and Andy's notes. Again, excuse my rambling. It's an amazing story, and amazing doesn't even begin to describe it. Honestly, you're a master of a marvelous stage, and I enjoyed reading your story and riding this roller coaster of emotions. Your story deserves to be published and I hope one day to see it winking at me from my bookshelf."
Great Read
"I read this story as a contestant for the Roadmap Awards on Inkitt. Normally I have very little time to squeeze in time for reading, but I'm glad I did this time around. Although the genre isn't my go-to, I thoroughly enjoyed the characters and their individual personalities. Dialogue is something I have to try hard at, and this writer embeds dialect wonderfully. Keep up the great work."
An enjoyable read
"(Completed) I personally dislike Shakespeare and have an internal feud of my own going on with Romeo and Juliet, so I wasn't too sure I'd stick with this the whole way, given the premise - but I was quickly endeared to Andy's sarcastic little quips and writer's woes; she was entirely too relatable. All the characters were - even the secondary characters underwent development and weren't just there for the sole purpose of giving random pep talks to the MC. The relationship between her and Dan was lovely to read - sweet and awkward with a healthy (unhealthy?) dash of drama, they complemented (and complimented, much to Andy's surprise) one another well; they seemed natural together and I really enjoyed getting to see their friendship blossom throughout. I'm still a bit iffy about the short story - I felt it took a little away from the main narrative, but at the same time, I thought it was a nice addition. I think I'd have been more engaged with it if the short story had its own chapters? Or was given in its entirety at the end? But that's just me being fussy xD Anyhoo, really good job with this! I look forward to reading more of your work :)"
A Genuinely Good Read!
"Will takes us on the emotional roller coaster of Andy Sharpe's life as a 1990s Senior in High School, as she not only tries to survive her final year of school, but is determined to end the feud that has plagued her father's life for twenty years after meeting the boy who's father happens to be on the opposite end of said feud. This entails jumping on the opportunity to direct the school's rendition of "Romeo and Juliet" with many memorable characters in tow! Reminiscent of "Romeo and Juliet" in itself, this tale leads our mostly-fearless (sort of) protagonist onto her own quest to conquer her inner insecurities and outward obstacles, all while learning about love (and other life lessons) as she falls head over heels for the one boy she shouldn't! A few parts feel a little drawn out, but overall reasonable to the storyline. If you're looking for a quality story by a talented author, this one is a must! Readers, expect to form an emotional attachment to the characters, especially Andy, and to laugh, smile, be surprised, outraged, and yes, maybe even cry! Well worth the read!"
The Feud
"The Feud is a classic coming-of-age story. It includes central themes such as growing up, self-discovery, family and school life, and most importantly, first love - wrapped up in a great drama created by two rival families, or rather fathers. Does this sound familiar? It should. Because the greatest love story of all time, Romeo and Juliet, finds not only a place in The Feud via excerpts of individual scenes at the beginning of each chapter but runs throughout the narrative on several levels. However, this story is NOT a rip-off of the classic. Not at all. It merely borrows its basic theme to create something new, coupled with humour but also serious topics. It was an enjoyable read with a likeable heroine/protagonist who, to my delight, is not portrayed as the 'perfect girl'. PS. In Shakespeare too, we are left in the dark as to why the Capulets and Montagues fight with each other in the first place. PPS. The young man on the cover reminds me of the Austrian chancellors - I found that quite amusing."
Such a fun read
"I read this story as the judge of an awards here on Inkitt and let me tell you, I was not disappointed. This author has a wonderful and refreshing writing style that manages to take serious topics and give them a dash of humor to keep things real. The characters were well developed and relatable. I enjoyed this story from start to finish. I even appreciated the ambiguity of the ending, as frustrating as it was, it was a super fun way to finish off the story. I would recommend this book to anyone looking to read a well-written and fun teen fiction. Bravo."
The Fued
"Fram reading the first two chapters, you've got some really good characters. The only thing I will say is that its a bit strange for you to include Andromeda's writing, as it's a completely different book with in a book that already exists. It takes away from the plot of the main story and can be confusing for the readers."
Where to Begin...
"I loved it. I just got to start by writing that. This story has such a strong beginning and captured me instantly. I said to myself as I was reading that if I had stumbled upon this book as a teenager, I would've bought it. The humour, oh my gosh! I laughed out loud so many times, and I had to cover my mouth to stifle my giggles as not to wake up my baby. I'm not very good at writing reviews, but I'm going to try because I have a lot going through my mind with this story, but I'm not very good at expressing my thoughts. So here goes... It's corny. I am not going to lie. There are quite a few corny and cheesy scenes, but it's not over the top. It's like just the right amount of corniness. Which I appreciate because I like corny. A little corny. Not too much. When reading a romance, it's nice to get that fuzzy feeling in your gut that makes you squirmish and, as an adult, takes you right back to when... just accidentally brushing shoulders with your crush made your head explode with fireworks. This story definitely hits those feelings on the mark. I'm actually very picky with romance novels, and most romances fail to hold my attention, but this story delivered a romantic slice of life on a gold platter. So, bravo there. This story has a few hooks. The first is finding out why Andy is self-conscious. I caught on right away when she wore her hood to the dinner table, and her dad made her take it off that there was something up. To be honest, I was a little disappointed that I found out rather quickly that it was due to the birthmark on her face. I felt like the author could have kept us in suspense for a little longer. I love suspense, and I don't enjoy it as much when I feel like all the answers are handed to me. Granted, I suck at figuring things out, but that's what makes it fun. There are two types of books. Those that force the reader to rack their brain and read in between the lines and those that give the reader all the answers without them having to put in much thought. For the birthmark, it was the latter. I feel like it would've made a more enormous impact if there was a scene of Andy maybe being bullied about her looks, which would really make the readers wonder what's wrong with her face? Why is she being picked on? Then, doing the reveal of oh, she has a birthmark that would have triggered anger and sympathy. Yes, there are bullying scenes, but we are introduced to these scenes already knowing about the birthmark. So, while yes, it still made me upset, it just wasn't as powerful, if that makes sense. Did it take away from the story? No, not really, this was just my thought as I was reading, because honestly, for me, finding out so quickly about the birthmark, I did lose a little interest, but the second hook kept me going. Andy's dad and the Tetamores. Seriously, what was the feud? I was so hooked on finding out what happened that the Tetamores names couldn't even be mentioned under the Sharpe's roof. That was the major hook that kept me reading. Sorry if this review is so scattered. It's because my thoughts are scattered. Let me see... grammar and punctuation! Okay, I will admit that sometimes the grammar distracts and breaks me out of the story while reading. I do believe that this story needs some more editing. All are simple fixes, really, so I only took off one star. I understand that this story was written around the time I was born, and grammar has changed significantly since then. I started writing in the late 90s myself, and many of the rules in writing that I learned no longer exist or have changed. However, I feel some things should be addressed, such as starting a new paragraph when a different character is speaking. There were times while reading when I had to reread the same thing two or three times because I couldn't tell who was talking due to how the paragraphs were organized. I mentioned earlier that the story has a strong beginning, but the middle didn't have me as enthusiastic. This is my problem, though, and it is no fault of the author. My high school was very BIG on Shakespeare. Every year we went to the theatre to watch Shakespeare. Every year we would put on a play by Shakespeare, and every year, we would read the plays and watch the videos. I still have my copy of Romeo and Juliet from high school. I know Romeo and Juliet like the back of my hand that I was reciting the lines at the top of my head as I read the chapters. Unfortunately, that made those chapters somewhat dull for me. It was very repetitive. I understand the author tried to do the rehearsals as realistic as possible, which he did nail it because yes, that definitely took me back to my rehearsal days, but it was a little too much. I personally don't think it was necessary to have that much dialogue from the play. It made me groan sometimes. I understand how Romeo and Juliet connect to the family feud, but at the same time, if I wanted to read Romeo and Juliet, I would just read the play. I was more interested in reading about Andy, Dan, Mari, Fer, and Cornsilk. The author created such a fantastic cast of characters, but I felt like they were sometimes overshadowed by Romeo and Juliet, which was a shame. Lastly, I did find that the dialogue, in general, didn't sound like ordinary teenagers. As I was reading, I compared how the students talked to that of when I was in high school, and I remember laughing to myself and saying, "wow, we must've been very uneducated," because we were so immature. The way the characters spoke, I pictured them more to be at the college or university level and sometimes had to remind myself that I was reading about high school students. There were times when the characters acted immaturely, but for the most part, they were very adult-like. I did read the author's note at the end, and he mentioned that he's aware of this, so I'm not going to say anything further on that. Overall though, a very heartwarming slice of life romance. Is this a story I would talk about to friends? Yes. Would I reread it? Yes, but I would skip some chapters with the theatre rehearsals. I'm delighted to have had the opportunity to read this book, even if it did keep me reading up until sunrise."
Review – The Feud
"Review – The Feud -@Will63 by Hempra The feud is a YA coming of age story chronicling the doings of a group of high schoolers, an enjoyable romp, albeit angsty as befits a YA story. I thought the dialogue was authentically teenage, almost as if it was the work of a teenaged author. At the end I found out that this novel was indeed completed by the writer during his teenage years. That, in itself is quite an achievement. There are two plots in this story, one, that of the school play being used as a means of enlightening two Capulet – Montague style feuding fathers. Two, the story of Andy who is awakening to love, fighting through the difficulties created by her physical disadvantage. There is also the ‘story within the story’, ‘Where the Redfern blows’, serialised by Andy for the school newspaper. The subplots and themes are handled with skill. I would have liked the serial to be shown as excerpts only, rather than as full length. This might provoke more curiosity among readers. I like the way common idioms are polished up for use-‘The bagged cat was clawing for freedom’. I felt that there could be more trimming of verbiage, overall, to make most of the conflict, and enable a sharper impact on the reader. Some of the imagery was very good – ‘looking up into the endless emptiness of the sky …..falling into it,’ to describe Andy’s state of mind when she knows that Sharon has set her sights on Dan.. Most of the techniques are used effectively, ie: teenage humour – when the kids get their mother to talk through her stuffed nose, describing Mari as the Flower Child. I thought that these would be even more effective if trimmed down and used sparingly. Mari ‘s character could be delineated with more detail. She is described as pretty, perfect and a do- gooder, but we need to see her in action. There are some repetitions that need to be weeded out, such as the word ‘caressing’ used too many times. Some of the imagery needs to be polished up. I am curious as I am sure most readers would be, as to the root cause of the feud. I think the story would be better for a big reveal. There is a good kernel here to be improved upon, and can be converted into a winner. And finally, I don’t have the heart to talk about punctuation to a teenage writer."
Good
"In the description I would prefer to read the awards the story has at the end, it just distracts and can put the reader off seeing that first. Senior should start with a lowercase ‘s’ and freshmen should also start with a lowercae ‘f’. The line about Andy’s sister’s crush could be smoother. ‘Then she discovers her freshman sister has a crush on the boy next door who the Sharpe girls have been warned never to have anything to do with!’ The rest of the description is nice, really got the vibe of teen high school romance. You don't need to put ‘one’ or ‘two’ etc at the start of each chapter, the chapters go up in numbers it's unnecessary having them there. Some sentences could be broken up to smaller ones. Some sentences could be worded better, like the one about the planets towards the start of chapter 1. ‘Who Did It’ should not have capital letters. Your chapter sizes are bang on, but the pacing of the story I think could be a bit faster. There are times where there are capital letters where there shouldn't be capital letters. ‘Stolen’ in stolen fireworks is an example. Whuffing is also partly normal text partly italic text. I loved the line ‘The were so adorable Andy wanted to bang her forehead against the tree.’ I also really like that the play is Romeo and Juliet and that there is a real Romeo and Juliet in the story. Nice parallel. Classic high school love story trope. Your paragraphs in chapter 2 could be grouped together better, and some lines on their own could be with paragraphs or other lines at least. The way their dad talks about the boy in from the family they don’t like in the second part really gets over how much Andy’s family doesn’t like and makes the reader wonder more about what happened. The family themself seem very nice, their relationships and characters are set up well. There are times were lines need more punctuation like commas and places were they could replace semi-colons and places were semi-colons should not be. This is a good story and I love Andy’s character but it needs tidying up. "
Good
"Excellent beginning"
The feud
"It's a great plot and I like your style of writing. It's just that making Andromeda's thoughts look like a conversation was a bit confusing to me. Other than that everything is beautifully portrayed. Keep up the good work and all the best for future chapters. Enjoy writing. 😊"
The fued
"You have a great plot there with strong characters and your writing style is nice too. I think this is a story that has potential. Keep writing."
