What is your opinion?
It's a good start
"Your story has great potential. The grammar needs a little work, and another good read through and you should be set. I am a little confused as to why she's alone. I think we need a little backstory for Ivy...and she has a great unique name. Your cover and plot are intriguing and I can't wait to see more come out of this story. Why was Earl even at her house? What exactly is the nature of their relationship? How do they know each other? Keep up the good work! The plot and your character development and descriptions are legitimately amazing!"
Engaging story
"The foundation of this Fictional book is excellent. It engaged me to read more. Young readers will love it! Vera Lucia Lima"
you made a Fan
"everything was superb i liked it very much waiting for other chaptes"
Intriguing
"I’m looking forward to seeing how this story develops, I’m very intrigued by it "
Great start!
"Hello! Your premise certainly seems interesting, and your ideas keep the reader intrigued. If they're not angels, what are they? Why do they watch people? What do they do? The characters you've introduced are also quite dynamic, and I would like to learn more about them. As for grammar, you do have some errors, such as syntax, missing punctuation, and spelling, though these can easily be straightened out. All in all, not bad! Best of luck! -E.S. Paul"
Good start
"Its a great start to an amazing story. There's a few errors here and there with a couple of wrong words or wording of sentences, but other than that its good. There is great character introduction and world building already in the first chapter, I cannot wait to see what happens next."
Intriguing plot
"I look forward to reading on. I'm gripped by the concept of the story and want more. I think the author could improve by proofreading and revising the story once more, as I found the numerous spellIng errors and missing words distract the reader from the great plot line. Great effort though :) "
One of a Kind
"From what you have so far, I like it. I love the main character, she seems logical, I like how she thinks before she acts. Then there's the plot, I'm entranced. I want to know who was whispering in her ear, why she can't remember what she did the previous night, and so much more. This is truly a mystery novel and I can't wait for more."
Intense!
"I love the story, can’t wait for you to continue. The descriptiveness adds an amazing eerie feel to it that I’m dying over! My only man tip to offer is your story could really benefit from reading out loud before posting. I found myself re reading or filling in where words should be. It’s a good habit because your mind fills in the blanks when your that invested in your book. Many writers would kill to have your writing talents, most novels never give me a true atmospheric feel as I read. "
Amazing
"I liked everything about it. Your writing style is really good and I enjoyed reading it."
Very nice and rare!
"I like the idea, it's rare but special. Keep up the good work!"
Early days but it's a story with potential!
"It's hard to base too much of an opinion off the first two chapters, however I can tell that you are building up an interesting plot. The only main problem that I have is the punctuation, there are some words misplaced which interrupts the flow of the story. You have a clear outline for strong characters, just make sure the protagonists thoughts are clearly outlined because I found myself getting confused at times with the overuse of Rhetorical Questions. Overall though, this story has potential, so carry on writing. It is an interesting book with a beautiful cover! Whoever see's this, give this book a chance!"
Great Potential
"You seem to have a good plot, and your characters seem life-like and interesting. I get the impression that there's a connection between the nightmare, Earl and the crime - and that's certainly fascinating. Your main problem is grammar: punctuation is sometimes missing or misplaced, some words are used wrongly, and there are even text abbreviations in the speech: "u" instead of "you" and "coz" instead of "because." I also found some things confusing: is she going with Earl because she had a nightmare and he'd sleep in the same place as her the next night - and if so, why are they suddenly at school? Try clearing up motives and especially time: is it morning? Try using the sun or weather to show that! Overall, you description was very nice. Sometimes, you told instead of showed things about some characters, but generally, I thought description was one of your main points, especially for architecture. I like the fact that your story is set in Dublin, and that it is meant to be "unpredictable." You made a good start to the story, and I'm sure that with some clearing up and some grammar editing, this could eventually become a great story. I also like your title and especially the subtitle on your cover page!"
i see everything
"its ok but i cant get more of you"
Keep going
"I really really like your cover. It makes you want to read the story. I really like the way you write and the way tension was built up. So a thumbs up for the plot and your writing style. The grammar and your word order, however, could use an update. I myself do not live in an English-speaking country. I was recently advised to download "Grammarly" and bookmark "GrammarCheck". This helps me a lot, though it does not register each mistake. Maybe you could also try out these to help improve your story. Overall, I really liked your story and I hope you will keep writing."
Good
"For a start i think its a step in the right direction. The plot is intense, like its fully packed ready to burst or be unlocked, and you have done a god job of unpacking it piece by piece, though there is still room for improvement."
Captivating
"First of all I loved the cover. It;s captivating and suits the genre. The cover is mysterious itself. As the cover is the first thing that catches ones eyes. So, good choice. The start is quite interacting. It does catch your attention and that is good. The start is amazing and its good how you have descriped what she was feeling. Description was great. I can't say much bcz it"s just the start of your story. But keep up the good work. Will be waiting for updates. Love ya!!! Your's friend, Anna Enchant. ;)"
I See Everything
"I really liked the title and the cover. They were simple, but really something I've never seen before! I also admire the unique plot you've set up, although I must point out that the Preface could've been better, especially at the end. I liked the idea of the story and how you began it. But, I was a little disappointed that the execution of such a brilliant plot hasn't been done too well. For starters, I'd suggest you to choose simpler-sounding words. After writing each chapter, read it aloud to yourself or a friend and see how it sounds. It is odd to say, "He oath to protect me". Rather, if you had written "He vowed to protect me", it would've sounded better. I hope you understand what I mean. Also, please take care of your grammar. If you think you can't do it by yourself, you can seek the help of a friend or Google up websites that check for grammatical errors in pieces of writing. All this will really be a big step towards improving your story. Now, I don't know how long you've been writing, but I can tell you this: each time you write, you improve for the next time. So, don't lose heart just because of my negative review. Like I said, I really love the plot. I just wish that you'd executed it better. I know you can do it. Take care and all the best with your story!"
